Stunt 10: How the Swine became a Couch Swine....

Every legend has a begining......

The scene is set in the room of a 3rm-HDB flat. A 8mth old infant was playing in his craddle with is elder brother playing underneath the craddle. As the infant caught sight of the elder brother playing with a batman figurine, he wanted to join in the fun too. The end result, the infant climbed out of the craddle and hit/crashed/hamtamed his head onto the floor. The poor infant hence lost part of his natural thinking ability. His conditon was further agrivated by another collision at the age of 3. Jumping on his parents bed, he suddenly lost footing and hit the bed corner. A bad and deep cut resulted. To further add to his agony, the father *gei kiang* think its juz a small cut and applied 青草油(A kind of chinese medicated yellow lotion with max burning feel but super effective cause wun feel any pain after the burn feel) to the wound. This hence muz have burned another wire in the infant's brain leading to a badly damaged brain which can't analyze and think properly. 14 years down the road.....

THE COUCH SWINE is BORN

Heres a few other reasons why the swine became the COUCH SWINE...

(Couch Swine's Bed)

The swine's bed is always full of his rubbish, may it be stuff that he wants or dun wan,he leaves them all over the place. Plus it stinks.... and Beer Pig is also in the room snoaring away during the day...

(The Swine's table)

Another heap of mess which dosen't allow him to land his soul. He dosen't hav much of a choice left but to reside in his favourite location infront of the T.V. The couch was bought recently and it sure attracts him. As mentioned earlier, the two knocks on his head sure reduced his capability to think like a normal person and degraded it into that of a swine. It also completely removed his ability to remember things aka STM(short term memory)

But................................

All accidents bring legends super natural abilities; the swine is no exception. Here lies the powers of THE COUCH SWINE:

1) Able to consume others food in the blink of an eye without others knowing

2) Down 2 cans of diet coke in 60 secs

3) Watch T.V, Play PSP, Listen to mp3, talk on the phone all at the same time

4) Call others one after another to initiate chats

5) Consume all food, sedap or not, big or small

6) Deny all acts of responsibility without blinking

7) Know how to appear when food is avail and disappear when chores are ard

8) Able to hear the slightest click of the door( to noe when the parents leave and come back)

9) Feel hungry all the time

10) Be immune to all sorts of punishments, scoldings, advice, threats and naggings